A pricey birthday dinner? You went. A destination wedding that required a flight, hotel, and three new outfits? You just figured it out. A group trip you hadn’t budgeted for? Saying no meant admitting that money was the reason, and for many people, that’s enough to make them say yes anyway.
Gen Z is starting to change that. From talking openly about the cost of experiences to opting out when something isn’t in the budget, younger Canadians seem to be more and more willing to set financial boundaries—and even saying them out loud.
“I’d say in general, Gen Z is more vocal about boundaries, whether it’s their finances or in their career or their personal life, than probably any other generation,” says Jessica Moorhouse, an accredited financial counsellor and author of Everything but Money.
Why is Gen Z more comfortable saying no?
Part of the shift may simply be that this generation came of age with a louder voice. Social media gave young people a public platform much earlier than previous generations had, Moorhouse says, and allowed them to compare experiences and question some of the norms they inherited.
They’ve also had plenty to question. Gen Z entered adulthood during COVID-19, soaring housing and living costs, and a difficult job market. Moorhouse believes watching older generations deal with everything from overwork and stagnant wages to financial mistakes may have encouraged some young people to ask why they should continue doing things the same way as the generations that came before them.
That doesn’t necessarily mean Gen Z has eliminated the shame surrounding money, though.
Social media can give the impression that everyone is suddenly sharing their salary, budget, debt, and bank balance with the world. In reality, Moorhouse says many of the young people she speaks with still struggle with financial shame and don’t want their friends knowing how much they earn or whether they’re carrying debt. And the financial influencers talking openly online represent only a small slice of the generation (and are often angling for paid sponsorships as a reward for sharing their financial hero journey online).
Still, being willing to tell your friends that something isn’t in the budget, or doesn’t align with your financial priorities, is a valuable habit to develop early.
Saying no is a financial skill
There will always be something competing for your money. In your 20s, it might be dinners, concerts, weddings and group trips. Later, the stakes and dollar amounts may change, but the basic decision doesn’t: Is this worth delaying one of my other financial goals?
Moorhouse calls the ability to make that call a lifelong skill.
“There’s always going to be financial dilemmas,” she says. A last-minute trip, for example, might be technically possible, but if taking it adds another six months to paying off your debt, you have to decide whether the trade-off is worth it.
The good news? Saying no gets easier.
Moorhouse compares setting financial boundaries to a muscle: the more you use it, the more confident you can become in knowing what you want and whether a particular expense fits into the plan. That matters because saying no to friends and family can be especially difficult when we’re used to assuming everyone in our social circle is doing roughly as well financially as we are. Sometimes opting out can feel like revealing something about your finances, even if you’re just prioritizing them.
And that distinction is important. Being able to afford something and deciding it’s worth spending your money on are two different things.
You also need to know when to say yes
There is a flip side to getting really good at financial boundaries: you can get too good at saying no.
Moorhouse experienced some of this herself. When she was starting out, much of the financial advice she encountered focused on frugality, avoiding debt and spending less. Anyone remember a little Canadian reality TV show called ’Til Debt Do Us Part?
